Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Off the wagon

Okay, I really really don't want to write this post. But I think at this point it might be one of the things that will help me most. Over the past 2 months (basically since right before we went to get Quinn) I've put on 5 lbs. In some of my glory days I could have done that in 2 days. So 2 months doesn't seem so bad (smells like justification, doesn't it?) HOWEVER, that is the limit to what I will allow myself to gain.

And at this point, it is all that Weight Watchers will allow me to gain!

If you are unfamiliar with how WW works, you eventually get to a goal weight. Once you stay at the goal weight for 6 weeks of weighing in, you become a "Lifetime" member. This means that you get to attend meetings for free *as long as* you stay at your goal weight. Weight Watchers is rather generous because they also give you up to 2 lbs. over your goal weight as a little grace coverage. But anything over that, you have to start paying again.

Last September, I reached my Lifetime status. And I've managed to stay roughly 4-5 lbs. UNDER my goal. So with this 5 lb. increase I am back up at my goal weight (I still have the 2 lb. grace weight before I have to pay.) I have to weigh in once a month in order to keep my Lifetime status. My next weigh in is two weeks away. I'd really like to lose a few pounds before I have to weigh in.

So, the point of this post other than to whine, complain, feel sorry for myself and blame these 5 lbs. on Quinn? Really, its to light a fire under my ever expanding buns! I figured if I let you know what's happening, I'd be responsible to give a report on my next weigh in. Here's been my biggest issue, (other than eating whatever I want to dull the ringing in my ears from these deafening children. oh. and Funnelquest '09) I have not been going to meetings. For me, meetings are key! Even though I rarely learn something new (not because I'm so smart or have it all together, but rather, I KNOW what I'm suppose to do- I just do otherwise) it is SO good to be around other people with a similar struggle.

I feel like I have so much on my plate right now. Days are filled morning 'til night. I was able to make it to a meeting from time to time on a Saturday morning but now Olivia starts ballet classes Saturday mornings until November. And honestly, I used to roll my eyes when people said they were too busy to get to a meeting. I used to think, "Quit making excuses, do it for yourself. If you love yourself and want to make an investment in your future, find time to go to a meeting." Ummm... sorry about that!

I HATE that I'm back here again. Pride comes before the fall! The quicker I realize that this will probably always be something I struggle with and I should NEVER eat 1/2 cake, even if my weight is "down", the better! Sigh. So, today, I'm climbing back up onto the wagon, getting out my points calculator and my tracking sheet and am NOT going on a diet, but AM getting back to smart eating.

Hey, if you're looking for me, I'll be in the corner, hunkered down with some Smart Pop (its 0 points after all!)


cindy said...

2 lbs doesn't seem like much grace... shouldn't it be proportionate to what you weigh... 2 lbs for a guy at 175 seems different than 2 lbs for a woman at 125. Oh well, God's grace is bigger than all of that. :)

KTC said...

Oh, I can relate... but, I promise you, catching yourself at 5lbs is the RIGHT response! Let's talk and track points together for the next 2 weeks! I could use the help!