First off, I have to give a shout out to 5 amazing women from the Oregon District (my neighborhood) who came to my house yesterday while I was at chemo and the boys were at the Y with the nanny and graciously CLEANED MY HOUSE. And I'm not talking just cleaned... I'm talking I might not have cleaned some of these things since I've had kids kind of clean. I may have been *slightly embarrassed* and slightly enternally greatful for your kind heartedness. It truly was amazing and we are so very thankful.
Yesterday was the last chemo day of round 2. It was the quickest one yet (only 5 hours). My friend, Sally, came and spent a few hours with me. It was nice to not have to talk, but then at the end when it was time to *walk and talk* she went with me. (At the end of each abdomenal chemo, I spend some of the final hour walking and trying to get my belly full of fluids moving... that with the fatigue are the two worst parts of this thing.) It was nice to have a friend come and see my new life.
Day 8 (yesterday) of the 21 day cycle isn't all that bad. I get the steroids and once the fluid is a bit re-distributed (it usually takes 6-8 hours later to not feel so bloated), I feel pretty good. Now I have 13 days until the next chemo day. It feels like a bit of a relief. Although this Friday I have to go in to the hospital and get labs drawn and then go for a CT scan. I guess I will have to get one every other cycle to make sure there are no new tumors. And as long as my numbers keep going down and stay down, it would be unlikely that there would be. But it is good to keep multiple checks on things.
I have to say, I'm not looking forward to Friday. Just having to go in on an "off" day and spend 3 hours at the hospital is a bummer. It is such a reminder that my life is not my own. I've said before, this doctor's office now *owns* me. They tell me when and where to be... they don't ask. And then the following week on my truly off week, I get to go in on Thursday for labs and an appointment with the doctor. Which is good. He checks in with me. See's how I'm doing. Goes over blood work etc. But it's still scary. And I HAVE to do it.
I continue to nearly constantly have to give my worries over to God. I just wonder if I will ever get over this? I mean I will have to do these scans every three months for the first two years. And then every six for the next three. There will always be a fresh way to trust Jesus with my worries. I guess that is good?!
Please pray that I would enjoy my week(s) until the next round. I tend to already look ahead or feel bummed about Friday or worry that a new symptom will creep up and prevent me from enjoying... instead of just enjoying. Sounds exhausting to be me, doesn't it?! Ugh. Thanks for hanging in there with me.
**Disclaimer** for some odd reason my spell check wasn't working.. please excuse any typos. I wasn't in the mood to wait.