Tuesday, July 26, 2011

mom of the year

Yesterday was one of those days. The kids drove. me. bonkers. It started about five minutes after they rolled out of bed asking 14 million times if today was *cartoon day?* No, it's not. Today is Monday. But is today cartoooooon day? No! It's not. WHAAAAAAA, we want cartooooon day. Somebody shoot me.

And it went on and on like that pretty much all morning about something or another. My fuse was pretty short. I thought getting them out of the house would help. At 1:30, I couldn't stand it (and by it, I mean *them*) any longer so we went to the park. The awesome park. The one that has a ginormous sand pit. The one that I used to obsess over whether or not they were getting sand in their hair and playing nicely with the other 75 kids. The one that now, as long as no one is bloody or making others bloody, I don't care what they are doing or where they are putting sand.

Finally, at 3:00, when I could take the heat no longer, we loaded up (sand and all) and rolled over to the outdoor pool. Steve was planning on meeting us there at 4:00, which meant only an hour by myself. The heavens parted and the Lord had mercy because I rolled up and found a front row parking spot. We went to the kiddie pool where we usually stay until I can get some parental back up at 4:00.

Then, *IT* happened. A conspiracy that must have happened back at the sand pit. The *let's send mom to the loony bin* plan. Aka: Operation *Watch Me*.

You see, I am an only child. And before you make all kind of assumptions, I'm pretty well adjusted (just don't ask me to share anything and for sure never tell me no!) As an only child, I have no experience with contending for parental attention. Which also means I have no modeling (for better or for worse) to draw from. I'm making this up as I go along, people!

Within 45 minutes of being in the kiddie pool, my three children must have said the phrase, "Hey mom, watch me!" 250 times. Upon the 251st time, my eyes became red with rage and I had had enough. "Okay. You may NOT ask me to watch you do anything else. Nothing. Do. Not. Ask. Me. One. More. Time."

To which Quinn waited about 3 seconds and said, "Hey mom, pay attention to this..." I'm pretty sure my head spun around and steam came from my ears. Oh. My. Gosh.

I then instructed them to not even talk to me. If they wanted to talk to someone they were allowed to talk to each other. By the time Steve arrived at 4:00, I'm pretty sure the other mom's at the pool were ready to call Children Services on me. Which really would have been fine at that point. Just make mine a padded cell! Cookoo! Cookoo!


vwiller said...

Not that much longer until O goes to school...and then to all of that fun! I was the same mom as you today...only it was the local pool not sand pit. There are at least 2 days a week when I question whether someone I saw would call Children's services for some thing one of mine did...very often to another one! And yet when you walk into their rooms at night (when they are asleep not keeping you up) you are reminded of the pure magic that they are! Hope tomorrow is a better day!

Anonymous said...

Been there, done that. I did the same thing Monday when the kids were playing "first one." You know that snazzy game where the kids say (really scream) "I'm the first one to jump in the pool with an intertube" and other very specific actions.

Sometimes a mom just needs her kids to be reel it in.


Cortney @ evanhaslanded.com said...

LOVE IT!! I'll join you because I may have said, in a somewhat quiet and controlled voice, "Shut up!" to Evan last week at the pool! Shoot I'm not an only child so I have no excuse. Mama needs some quiet time once in awhile people! After I said it, I noticed the family next to me looking at me, so maybe I didn't say it quiet enough. Heck I think I have said that only one other time, so yeah, I was *that* parent! :-)

KTC said...

Painful!! It gets easier. Then harder again. How's that for an encouraging word? .... love you!

Lauren Kort said...

I'm so sorry that day played out as it did, but goodness was this a funny post to read!!!

Connie said...

This made me laugh out loud, literally! A friend and I were at a park with our kids and we were discussing the "Mom, watch me!" phenomenon just today. Ugh!

jenny from mommin' it up said...

that is one of my biggest pet peeves. especially when I am obviously doing something else, like when I was at the pool today trying to get Jonah wrapped up in my babywearing thing and Joshua kept yelling at me to watch him - uhhh sure I'll just attach your brother to my body without looking at what I am doing, I am sure that will turn out great! Oy.

Marisa said...

Thanks for keeping it real! I'm glad I'm not the only one who loses her cool in public. My meltdowns are usually in the grocery store :)