Thursday, November 17, 2011

I see London, I see France

Last night at Awana (a church club my kids are a part of) the boys did a Thanksgiving craft. They made paper turkeys. On the feathers, the adults wrote what the kids said they were thankful for. Quinn's came home with mom, dad, dog and home on his feathers. Thanks, Quinn. Turner's came home with bread, chicken and underwear on his. Ahhh, yes. Typical Turner. We had a good laugh over that one, you can be sure.

I mentioned a few blogs ago that I've been reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and that it is pretty much changing my life. Thank you to those of you who offered to send me a new copy. I was able to go ahead and secure a new one:) Good thing too, because I really needed to keep chugging along.

For example, I was in line at a store this morning and I was waiting behind an older gentleman. When I zeroed in on him, I realized he could have been my dad from behind. He even had my dad's big 'ole ears. It was all I could do to choke down the lump in my throat and squeeze back the burning hot tears so that I could pay the cashier with a bit of dignity.

I got in the van and the tears came. As they will. I could see myself sliding down the slippery slope. The not just being sad kind of day, but the I'm losing my grip kind of day. Then I remembered, be thankful. Even there, in the midst of my grief, there had to be SOMETHING to be thankful for. So I let 'em rip.

I'm thankful that the man looked like my dad and I thought of him today.
I'm thankful that he passed in September and not now in the flurry of the holiday season.
I'm thankful that he didn't linger in pain and suffering for a long time.
I'm thankful that we had a very nice Thanksgiving with him last year.
I'm thankful that he gave me a winning lottery ticket last Christmas and what a fond memory that will always be.
I'm thankful for a blue sky day in November in Ohio.

I'm thankful for underwear.

Because when all else fails, my son has taught me, you can always... ALWAYS be thankful for underwear!

Guess what? I still miss my dad and my mom. I still have a lump at the top of my throat. But grief didn't sabotage my day. And that is a reason to be thankful!


Rose said...

I love it! You have to love kids! Sorry I have not been keeping up with your blog! I am back in the classroom after many a year of having an office! i.e. I live at school. Your hair looks so cute, I think you are one of those people who can pull off super short pixie hair, I LOVE it. I am glad your scans have been going well. I think of you often, I think of your sweet momma that I had the pleasure of meeting while she was with us here on Earth and I think of the heart ache you feel when you think of your dad. So I have no fluffy words to say, I just want you to know that you are so often on my heart. I know that you will have bittersweet memories this holiday season along with sweet, sweet happy memories your children will make for you at the same time. Take care of yourself, know that you and your family are lifted up in prayer by so many. :)

jenny said...

Glad the Lord gave you some sweet "thankful" moments in the midst of missing your dad. I am sure you miss your parents every single day! Praying that God continues to carry you through each day and upcoming holiday season. Love you, sweet friend!

KTC said...

:) Great!! I've heard lots about the book... don't know if I could get through all the "poetic" nature of it, but what a great practice -- thanksfulness... which leads to contentment. I need a little of that!

Jeni said...

Turner is so funny!!! One year Jake had to write what he was thankful for about his parents....

He wrote, "I'm thankful for my Mom because she feeds me and washes my clothes." That was it. :)

I need to finish that book too.